Don't envy others, because it's not always the way it seems.

With new social media, it is sometimes so easy to look at other peoples lives, and think, "Wow, I wish my life was a good as his/hers".   With our lives being published on Facebook and Twitter,  some people can spin their lives to look perfect:  beautiful children, a wonderful marriage, lots of material things, exotic vacations, etc.  But what I have learned is that their actual life isn't always the way it seems.  One of my daughter's very good friends publishes wonderful praise for her husband.  I said to my daughter that her friend's marriage seemed so perfect, and she just laughed.  "Mom, she tells me all the time the problems with her marriage and sometimes she is really unhappy and frustrated."  I'm not judging her friend for not having as great a marriage as she "spins" in social media, but I want to pass on the life lesson, that if you envy other's for their life situations, you might not know how many skeletons are in their closets, or how miserable they might really be.  Some of the "happiest" people can be the most depressed when they are alone.  So don't compare yourself and your relationships with others.  The more you know about the other's, the less you might want to envy.

Don't tell people how they should feel.

People have all different life experiences and all types of views.  Once I was telling a group of friends that my daughter had started dating a boy with a disease that he could live with, but it would greatly impact his lifestyle, thus impacting hers if she got involved with him.  I voiced my concern with these friends and one of them said, "You shouldn't feel that way".  Who was she to tell me how I should feel?  I hate that saying.  When you say that, you are judging that person.  What you are saying, is that YOU know the right way to "feel" and the other person is "wrong".  So try to understand where the other person is coming from.  Offer up alternatives, or voice how you might feel in the same situation, but unless you have lived the exact same experience, don't tell someone, "you shouldn't feel that way".

Live for today, don't worry about tomorrow.

I am now 59 years young.  I color my hair, I try to work out and maintain my weight.  Between my eyes, I am in my 20's (or maybe 30's) but when I look in the mirror it shows a much older woman.  Today I found out that a very good friend of mine who is within 3 years of my age died suddenly from a brain aneurysm.  I have been wanting to update this blog for over a year, and have been putting it off.  I started thinking about Mary and all of the things she might have wanted to do if she knew she only had another day, week or even a year left.  Did she spend as much time with her children and grandchildren that she wanted?  Did she eat that chocolate ice cream that she might have denied herself?  I know we have to plan for the future and make sacrifices today, but Mary's sudden departure made me think of all the things I would want to do with my limited time.  So I am picking up my computer again, and making sure that my life lessons are documented for my grandchildren.  So kids, don't worry about tomorrow.  Live one day at a time and enjoy it.  Don't be anxious about tomorrow.  Plan for and be prepared for the future, but live for today, and make the best of it.